summer dawn--
the perfect markings
of the young sparrow
--Tom D'Evelyn
This is distinct to me for a few reasons. The overall is one of what happens visuallly so early in the day. Things are highly particular. You have captured this here in the language. "Dawn" houses a "w" and yet a long sound. The second line is peaked with syllables so that when the young sparrow makes its entrance, there is an identification with the field of vision. There is another "w" at the end, which conceptually contains and describes the markings of the feathers.
--Madeleine Findlay
